diary

Symphony to the King of my Heart

5:51:00 AM Phantasm Darkstar 0 Comment(s)

Hello, if you are reading this, I would like to thank you for coming in the middle of my 2017 and making it all the way through the end of the year. But I thank God first because you are His blessing to me.

"Before all I heard was silence"
Thank you for being my confidant. Even when at times, I fear to open myself up because you might see me as weak or emotional and that I might disappoint you. But courage doesn’t mean you don’t get afraid. Courage means you don’t let fear stop you. So I still do it and you still accept me in spite of my flaws and you still got my back (well, I got yours, too, bruh).

"Was solo singing on my own"

I thank God so much. Words are not enough to describe it. I appreciate, and I am thankful for so many things; on how we share the same views and goals. It’s amazing to find someone who shares the same wavelength as your own; that level of understanding. Also on how much we are alike and how opposites we are that we complement each other. My twin.

"Now I can't find the key without you"

I’m a dork as you call it, but it’s because I’m happy when you are. Remember whenever I would say, “made you laugh tho”? I’d love to cheer you up in the middle of a busy day and in between things that make you cranky. Upsetting you is the worst feeling. I really feel bad whenever you get mad or even when you Just get annoyed or irked. I’m sorry for those mOments.

I am also thankful for the Naz rants. “Yah!” I appreciate that you truSt me on those matters and that you chose to share those things with me. I am also grateful for how open you are to me—on how you let me in, know you bEtter and see your dark side. Thank you.

"And now your song is on repeat"
You call me emotional, but that’s Just because I miss you so. You don’t havE to be deployed Just to make me realize how mUch you mean to me. I already know from the very beginning. I cherish and thank God for every moment I share with you.

"And when you're gone, I feel incomplete"
Thank you for the good mornings, the lambings, kiSses and kalongs. The random times when we would just stare at each other, nod, and smile. How we would communicate with our eyes and understand everything. I love those moments.

"And I'm dancin' on to your heartbeat"

Thank you for “training” me to reach the best version of myself (we are both getting there, love). Nigga ya gonna train me next on sniper shooting, yah? Lol. Also looking forward to our salmon slappin’ (oh wait, it’s just you who slaps it.), steak and wine night.
Thank you for the times when you had to scold me when I fail to drink my medicine because I’m busy with my work. Or when I always forget to rehydrate. You make me feel giddy in spite of getting scolded because you make me feel how much you care.

"Life was stringing me along"
ThaNk you for staying up late just to make time for me, when I know you hAve been busy all day. And for the amaZing dinner. Jo’s cooking show is definitely my fAvorite.
People always have something to say, especially on how difficult ouR situation is. You bEing in the military, the distance, the deployments. They doN’t know us. They have no idea how much yOu make me happy. They don’t know how completely confident I am in you.

"Every day you're here, I'm healing"

You always tell me not to expect anything from you because you will fail me. So I don’t. Because of that, you have no idea how often I am surprised and amazed by you. Or do you?

"Like a love song on the radio"
We are not perfect. I know that we would still go through a lot of challenges. We will fight. But do always remember that I love you so. And if I might make you feel that I have disrespected you or whatsoever that may upset you, please remember that it will never be my intention. I pray that you wouldn’t give up on me because I feel that I could be difficult and annoying at times. Though, I also pray that we would never reach that point because we always deal with our issues maturely. But Just in case my love, please do remembeR the things I have said as you read this letter.

"I'm sorry if it's all too much"

Thank you for being there, for helping me fix the broken pieces, and for still cherishing what’s left of me. Thank you for empowering me, motivating me, believing in me and bringing out the best in me, and always reminding me that I’m a queen (boom! Powerhouse. Power couple!) Thank you for being my adviser, my command in control when I’m at loss, my captain, my best friend, my bro, my partner.
"Then you came and you cut me loose"

As I have always promised, I will love you more.

"Will you hold me tight and not let go?"

Let’s continue to build our empire this coming year, my king.
P.S. Congratulations on your promotion. It’s official in a few days. I’m proud of you.

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